Wednesday, October 15, 2014

| 14102014 | * Unexpected.

Hi people, I have nothing much to update, because I'm doing the same thing like everyday.
My daily routine is just wake up, breakfast, class, lunch, do assignment/watch drama, dinner, sleep.
It repeats everyday, just to save up money and try not to spend money outside.

One thing is, when they have Halloween event, I try to attend because I wanna feel their culture here. Just because I'm only staying for a year here. I wanna make use of their every season, spring, winter, autumn and summer. 

I was actually plan with one of my flatmate to spend our Christmas in London,
it much be very happening. But the sad thing is, I never expect my mom never allow me to London. But its just 3 hours of train to the destination, and I have been there. So yes, I am mad, like seriously. Everyone here is going somewhere to spend their Christmas, why would I staying at home alone? I am here in the UK, if I come here just for my study, I would rather stay in Malaysia. At least, I'm not spending Christmas like a loner. At least, I'm not letting my parents worry about me. At least, I'm not left my friends, family and boyfriend behind. I would probably happier than I spend my Christmas alone here.

I really started to confuse and I dont know what my mom is thinking, I really mad and never expect that she cant allow me to London. And she asked me why am I become like that. For me, that sentence is like judging my personality. Why did she mean that? What did she mean that why am I becoming like that? I thought that would never be a matter, except for worry. I am already here, so I am more easily to go here and there to explore more. Isn't it? If worry, why am I here to let her worry me for a year? If worry, why not keep me stay in Malaysia? I am here only for study, not travel. Is that mean that I can come here once I have complete my degree and back to Malaysia and travel here again? I thought I should take the opportunity to explore it now, right timing. I thought I should be more independent in here since I am here, alone in oversea. I know that I come here for my studies, but its Christmas, and I will be having a winter break at that moment. What should I do? Like really stay in my accommodation?

I;m really mad, sad and disappoint.
I know end up I will still spend my Christmas in London. No matter who persuade her, or if she doesnt allow, I will still be there anyway. But what I sad is because of the judgement of personality. Its like telling me I've changed to a different person who makes her worry of me all the time. Did I? I already did everything fine and I really know to take care myself. 


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